Unsuccessful expansion

The pain today was too much.  After all these months and all the needles, I finally had a poke that I could not tolerate.

What was to be a routine visit to the Breast Center for an expansion didn't turn out so well.  Who knows why my body decided today was a no.  The doctor thinks that the port was under a nerve that had just woken up.  Maybe.  Maybe the last week of poking and scans finally caught up with my body and mind.  Maybe the frustration of the everything has reached its limit.  I have no idea.

I do know that when the doctor put the needle in the port the pain was more than I could stand.  She took it out, gave me a few minutes to regroup and tried again.  Again, the pain was too much.  She took out the needle and gave me a little more time to regroup.  For what ever reason, my body was not having it today.  I did not want another attempt.  It was just too much for me today.  So no expansion today.

We discussed taking some Ativan and maybe Tylenol for next week to help me get through the expansion.  Each week I get more feeling and it is only going to get more sensitive as time continues to move forward.  I am a little dejected.  I want so bad to be finished with the reconstruction.  I want to get back to my activities.  I am tired of sitting on the sidelines watching.  So, we shall see what happens next week.